Monday, December 14, 2009

Christmas Sucks: Part 4

Mistletoe: let's talk about it. Remember when sexual assault was as easy as hanging a poisonous and parasitic weed above your head? Try pulling that one in 2009, my friend. I dare you.

No, Christmas these days does indeed suck mightily. Nowadays, if you want any play, you have to be a gigantic asshole (so why is it I'm missing out, exactly?) or or something. That's a lot more work than the plant bit. Depressing.

The good news is that there is an antidote to the sexual frustration of the holidays. It's a little something I like to call "making a bunch of goddamn money from comic books." It's a fun game, and it involves nothing more difficult than listening to the Queen Whore himself, Ryan Lee.

Here's a couple that actually stand a good chance of sitting at your local comic book shop for $15 right now:

Marvel Essential Uncanny X-Men Vol 1
Currently sitting on Amazon with a low price of around $90, which is ridiculous. For those of you unfamiliar with the Marvel Essentials, they are the best bargain in comics. They reprint classic, must-have older comics material, they pack as many as 25-30 issues per book, and they all cost $20 or less. Are you kidding me? The only downside is that they're printed in black-and-white, but you can't argue the value.

Uncanny Volume 1 (note: called "Classic" X-Men in the earlier editions) collects the first 24 issues of the original run by Stan Lee. Now, what kind of a genius allows something like this to go out of print? I mean, no new reader would want to start at the beginning of the story, would they? Nah, no reason to make that available. It's unbelievable. Listen. Marvel. You know I'm available, right? Whoever is in charge over there is dropping the ball, BIG TIME.

At any rate, if you see this lying around your LCS, buy as many as they have and dump as soon as possible. Eventually somebody will figure this out and go back to press with it. But for now, take your $60+ profit and smile.

Essential X-Men Vol 1
OK, this gets a little confusing, but it sort of makes sense. "Essential Unanny X-Men" encompasses the original adventures, and "Essential X-Men" begins with the classic reboot at Giant Size X-Men # 1, that introduced the new team including Wolverine, Nightcrawler, Storm, and Colossus.

So Essential X-Men Vol 1 reprints Giant Size # 1 plus issues 94-119. Again, why would there be any demand for the first issues of the new team? I don't know how Marvel let this go out of print. But they did.

The result is that this is now a $50+ book on Amazon, and again possibly available at your LCS for $18. And that's an easy buy.

Other Essential to keep an eye on: Tomb of Dracula Vol 1, and Howard the Duck Vol 1. These are going for more than cover price right now, but haven't blown up to the point where you can really turn a profit. It's coming, though.

So have it, Insomniacs! Call it an early christmas present that you can use to earn money for more christmas presents!

- Ryan

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