Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Marvel Previews Nonsense!

Oh, Marvel.  How ridiculous you are, how consistently asinine, how stupefyingly stupid your propoganda machine has become.  I'd almost feel bad about piling on so much, but for the fact that you're so committed to ending comics as we know them in the hopes of an extra nickel this month.

So I open up the Marvel Previews and I don't even have to leave page two before heading straight to the blogger with the ol' poison pen.  There's your ad for Venom # 1.  Fine.  Rick Remender is fine, Tony Moore is fine, and if they want to turn Venom (whoever it is underneath the symbiote) into a James Bond guy, again, fine.  I don't care.

But how in the world are you going front page with this:

His first ongoing series?  Yes, it is indeed the first time that Venom has had a second ongoing series.  Did I imagine that book Danny Way was writing in 2003?  Nah, if I was dreaming, it would have been better stories than that.  Was that an 18 issue maxi-series, then?  Granted, Danny Way isn't one of The Architects, so ergot, vis-a-vis, concordantly, Marvel has erased it from their collective data banks.  But it happened.  I was there.  How do you not know that, Marvel?

So stupid on so many levels.  A) It's not his first ongoing series.  B) THIS book isn't an ongoing series, because it will get cancelled in shorter order than the first ongoing series they now don't seem to recall.  C) Who gives a shit whether it's his first ongoing series or not?

Let me save everybody the surprise, kay?  It's going to open at 35,000-37,000 issues, it will be at 20,000 issues by # 4, (maybe by # 2) and it will be cancelled within a year.  There's too much bullshit going on for this to fly any more.  Nobody cares.

And by the way, it won't have one thing to do with the quality of the book.  I have no idea how good this book will be.  Might make Ben Hur look like Showdown in Little Tokyo.  It doesn't matter how good it is, because if it did, Secret Six and Fantastic Four and Morning Glories would sell 150,000 copies a month.

All I'm saying is, when you publish 110 titles a month, and you've been psychologically torturing your readership into the false premise that the only thing that matters is The EVENT, then your Venom book doesn't stand a chance, whether it's his first or his ninth ongoing.  And the way things work now, he'll have a ninth ongoing by this time next year.

- Ryan


bushboi said...

i wonder how much it'll be... yep, 3.99.

Oh and just in case you hadn't seen the news, they're rebooting fantastic four to FF, and guess how much it is? 3.99. Fuck Marvel

Chronic Insomnia said...

If FF # 1 is an extra-sized issue for $3.99 and then it goes down to $2.99, I can deal with that. But if this is their way of trying to bamboozle another $1 out of me for regular sized stuff...I have a very difficult decision to make. Fantastic Four is my favorite Marvel book by a few leagues, and really special stuff. But I aint laying down for the floor lamp. At $4, I'm saying good bye. And I will do so publicly, with anger and tears.

Nick said...

I'm pretty sure Marvels new trick is to have a $3.99 #1 and drop the price to $2.99 after that. They are doing the same thing to Iron Man 2.0. I'm seriously thinking of dropping the floppies and just getting the TPB's when they come out. At least until they start selling the first TPB at $30 and then drop the rest to $20