Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Chronic Review: Colt Noble & The Megalords

Colt Noble & The Megalords
Image Comics

Scripts: Tim Seeley

Pencils: Mike Dimayuga

64 pages for $5.99

To cut to the quick, Colt Noble is a He-Man parody. This should come as no surprise to Hack/Slash fans, who are used to Seeley lovingly splashing that book with 80s references. Hack/Slash is also no stranger to parody.

And if you're a fan of Hack/Slash, there's no reason why you wouldn't enjoy Colt Noble. It's the same happy mix of dark humor, sex appeal, and gratuitous action. When you get done reading a Tim Seeley offering, you're guaranteed to be grinning at the end.

This is comics done fun, what Alan Moore would probably refer to as "hamburger reading." But you know what? A good hamburger is well....good.

The plot? I wouldnt' bother, but the gist of the story is that young Prince Jaysen is supposed to be learning how to be a man so he can learn how to be a king. He's more interested in getting into his personal trainer Mareea's pants. Or blouse. He'd like to get anywhere with her, but he's actually just a little dink.

The conflict? Again, not particularly important, but a young lady named Hoodoo Hex gets pushed to the brink by some religiously intolerant D-Bags at the local pub and ends up summoning Archfiend, Lord of Annihilation instead of the hot-goth boyfriend she was trying to cook up. Let the hijinkx ensue!

Prince Jaysen fumbles his way into a trap that ultimately turns him into action figure avatar Colt Noble! Young Jaysen now has the ability to turn the tide against Archfiend's attacks and maybe a shot at the lovely Mareea if his still toxically infantile mind doesn't sabotage his new beefy looks.

This comic will not change your life. But it is damn funny, particulary whenever Archfiend is on stage. Double that when he's on stage with his summoner, Hoodoo. As usual, Seeley takes shots at a wide variety of targets including many of the cliched comic tropes he's steeped the book in. If you don't have a stick in your bum, you'll laugh at this comic. It reads like a Masters of the Universe movie written by the guys who did Porky's. How can you deny that?

I say even if it wasn't good, we owe it to Hack/Slash to funnel poor Tim Seeley some money, because DDP is in some financial straits and is now paying him space? That's cute and all, but Mr. Seeley needs money. But thing of it is...Colt Noble is good. Go buy this book, laugh a little, bask in a little guilty pleasure and reward a deserving talent instead of some "must read event" book that you're not really digging, would you, please?

- Ryan

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